MARK TWAIN IN THE SAN FRANCISCO DRAMATIC CHRONICLE
1865
[EDITOR'S NOTE: These items have not been previously republished elsewhere. They are included in this collection because of their potential to be the work of Clemens and are deserving of further research and consideration.]
_____
COPYRIGHT INFRINGED
We understand that Fitz Smythe is highly indignant about "infringement of his copyright" in publishing his thrilling story of that cantankerous horse the other day. Fitz Smythe avers that he is under contract to furnish the Alta with from ten to seventeen short original romances daily -- which are published as "local intelligence" -- and that he is preparing to publish these productions of his imaginative genius in book form, early in the Spring. He protests against our "pirating" his "condensed novels of real life," and threatens us with an injunction and a suit for damages in case the offense is repeated. We shall lay the matter before our counsel "learned in the law," Sam Platt, Esq., of Judge Shepheard's Court, and shall act upon his advice in the premises.
_____
OH, MY!
The Prince of Virtue hath fallen! Purity averteth her face in shame! Morality hangeth her head in sorrow! For lo! it was the "tripple thunderer" who got the Cocos Island stock! Go, wretch! go, hypocrite! put down thy jug and weep! You have gone back on your high estate! you have brought contumely upon your great mission of regeneration! you have sold your princely birthright for a mess of Cocos Island manure! Go, thou, and weep in sackcloth and ashes! for the fanatic shall desert thee, the African shall bet on thee no more, and thy island treasures and they coveted guano shall pass from thee as a dream that is dreamt -- as a vision that is vain! Oh, grab your jug and git!
[This item refers to "Who
Got It?" that was published November 9, 1865.]
_____
[transcribed from microfilm]
